OK! Here's a two-fer:
The Simpsons Movie:
This movie is exactly what I was hoping it
would be. As my friend illajikal puts it, "It's a really long episode of the show..."
This is good. I only had a few hopes for this movie.
1. Be funny.
2. Don't be completely centered on Homer hurting himself... But let it happen a bit.
3. Don't re-use old jokes from the show. If this movie has Lenny(who I love)
saying "AAah! My eye! I'm not suppose to get (anything) in it!..."
I'm going to plotz! (not good. Lenny's eye joke has already expired)
They have made me happy. They did not reuse old jokes, Homer's pain
is a at a decent level, and it is funny.
Great work, fellas! One critique: There is a scene where an angry mob
breaks into the Simpsons' house and knock the door down. They come
in thirsty for blood and are held at bay by Maggie, but in the next shot,
the door is attached again, and the mob is outside and homer is
boarding up the door.
This is my only complaint about this one. Otherwise, it had what
the Simpsons' usually has, plus beefed up in artwork and animation
for the movie as well as the irony and irreverence we fans have come to
love.
Futurama: Bender's Big Score:
This one gets a similar rating except that I laughed a pant-load more
for this one!
Hilarious! And they have a really clever way of tying in the entire
series together
and make sense, and fun, of not making sense. And it all comes
together in the smartest, most ridiculous ways. I found one or two
things predictable, but that didn't hurt it for me.
But this is me here, so you know I spotted a mistake:
There is a part of the movie where Lela's pet, Nibbler, tries to intervene by
calling the rest of his species in to help by yelling "NIBBLONIANS! ATTACK!"
The problem is (nerd alert!)that the planet Nibbler was collected from was called Vergon 6.
Nibbler was rescued from there before it kerploded. He should be the only one of
his species left, unless there are others of his kind on other planets, which I will accept. However, HIS NAME is Nibbler. Not his species! He was named Nibbler by Lela when she witnessed him
eating other species on Vergon 6 just after she discovered the little guy. If his entire species
and planet were nibblonia, even though she found him on Vergon 6, that would just
be the weirdest coincidence. This is the only flaw that i have noticed. It's a big one, but as luck would have it, it happens in the future! So, it's completely preventable!
Either way, I laughed a lot! And I'm sure I will when i watch it again. Which I will.
If you were a fan of the show and were sorry to hear it was cancelled,
Just grab this movie! It picks up nicely.
Plus, it's from the future!
-Sleeve-
P.S. The show has been picked up again after 4 full length films and will be airing new episodes soon. :)
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
irreversible (2002)
Irreversible:
This one was tough at first. It starts with a constantly moving camera,
even when the characters remain still, which makes you wonder if it's just
for the sake of being different, but then lends itself to aide in the
illusion of the continuous shot that the director seemed to be going for, though
it is annoying at all times. The worst part of the camera trick for me
(when i wanted to stop watching due to nausea and irritation)was a very
long "continuous shot" in a bar where the main character is looking for
someone, and we follow him through the entire place with an awful siren-like
noise going constant with techno very faint in the background, while the
camera spins the whole time. Picture someone practicing with a bow-staff, and you have the view of the bow-staff. On the character-up at the ceiling-on someone else
-up at the ceiling-to a wall-to the floor-to the dark-to the ceiling-to
our character... This goes on waaaaaaaaaaay too long. This would have been fine
if it were just a continuous shot following him, but between the siren and
the spinning, I wanted to turn it off for fear that the whole movie would
be like this, and that i'd go mad with vomiting.
Thankfully, it isn't. What came next was disturbing in a far different way.
The following scene makes you wish the continuous shot was a little less
convincing, as the spinning stops and you watch a very brutal and too realistic
scene of two guys fighting.
This film is not for... most people. I don't want to give away the whole scene, but I will
not be complaining about not seeing the violence in this one.
I myself got through this scene and stopped the movie to cringe and wince for
a bit.
Did you ever see something in a film that looked so real that you wondered if
they really did that to someone, and everyone was in on it?... Kinda makes you
feel like that.
This makes number one of my top three most brutal and hard to watch scenes I've
witnessed in a movie.
#3 is the curbsmile in American History X. Thank god for cut-aways so they
can put the dummy in.
#2 would be the face smashy part with the butt of the gun in Pan's Labrynth.
This scene hits #1. The only one where I've stopped a movie for a bit.
I still feel a little uneasy, but it was on with the rest of the film...
Whether to come to grips with that scene or not, the rest of the movie
is a lot more tame with the exception of a rape scene that leaves an
awful discomfort in your soul as well. You feel dirty and gross watching
those scenes anyway, but this one is especially long which makes it worse.
Reverse chronological order makes the movie progressively tamer and happier
from this point on. For realism, this movie does it for me, because most of the cast
are idiots with nothing to say attempting to say things. Just like real people.
My biggest problem with this film is that the writer/director decided to throw in irony at the end, or foreshadowing but it's all backward so that doesn't work, by having one of characters mention a dream about the place where something
happens to them. This was not needed as we already saw the scene if we are at this point. This film was powerful enough to keep you engaged without that, thinking something more was going to happen, but it doesn't. Don't get your hopes up.
Well. That was long. Sorry.
-Sleeve-
This one was tough at first. It starts with a constantly moving camera,
even when the characters remain still, which makes you wonder if it's just
for the sake of being different, but then lends itself to aide in the
illusion of the continuous shot that the director seemed to be going for, though
it is annoying at all times. The worst part of the camera trick for me
(when i wanted to stop watching due to nausea and irritation)was a very
long "continuous shot" in a bar where the main character is looking for
someone, and we follow him through the entire place with an awful siren-like
noise going constant with techno very faint in the background, while the
camera spins the whole time. Picture someone practicing with a bow-staff, and you have the view of the bow-staff. On the character-up at the ceiling-on someone else
-up at the ceiling-to a wall-to the floor-to the dark-to the ceiling-to
our character... This goes on waaaaaaaaaaay too long. This would have been fine
if it were just a continuous shot following him, but between the siren and
the spinning, I wanted to turn it off for fear that the whole movie would
be like this, and that i'd go mad with vomiting.
Thankfully, it isn't. What came next was disturbing in a far different way.
The following scene makes you wish the continuous shot was a little less
convincing, as the spinning stops and you watch a very brutal and too realistic
scene of two guys fighting.
This film is not for... most people. I don't want to give away the whole scene, but I will
not be complaining about not seeing the violence in this one.
I myself got through this scene and stopped the movie to cringe and wince for
a bit.
Did you ever see something in a film that looked so real that you wondered if
they really did that to someone, and everyone was in on it?... Kinda makes you
feel like that.
This makes number one of my top three most brutal and hard to watch scenes I've
witnessed in a movie.
#3 is the curbsmile in American History X. Thank god for cut-aways so they
can put the dummy in.
#2 would be the face smashy part with the butt of the gun in Pan's Labrynth.
This scene hits #1. The only one where I've stopped a movie for a bit.
I still feel a little uneasy, but it was on with the rest of the film...
Whether to come to grips with that scene or not, the rest of the movie
is a lot more tame with the exception of a rape scene that leaves an
awful discomfort in your soul as well. You feel dirty and gross watching
those scenes anyway, but this one is especially long which makes it worse.
Reverse chronological order makes the movie progressively tamer and happier
from this point on. For realism, this movie does it for me, because most of the cast
are idiots with nothing to say attempting to say things. Just like real people.
My biggest problem with this film is that the writer/director decided to throw in irony at the end, or foreshadowing but it's all backward so that doesn't work, by having one of characters mention a dream about the place where something
happens to them. This was not needed as we already saw the scene if we are at this point. This film was powerful enough to keep you engaged without that, thinking something more was going to happen, but it doesn't. Don't get your hopes up.
Well. That was long. Sorry.
-Sleeve-
august underground (2001)
August Underground:
This film is suppose to be set up to look like a snuff film, where a few
morbid pals are filming the abuse and killing of kidnapped townsfolk.
This one was very tame for me. The idea of what you see is disturbing,
but watching it isn't. Any scene with any sort of blood already has the
blood on it from start to finish. Nothing happens in this film. It's made
to look like a home video of a few sadistic pals who kidnap, torture and
mutilate people. But don't worry, faint of heart, you won't see any
of this.
It is all implied. (fuck. I just went through this with the hostels...)
All deaths are already, severed limbs are already just sitting
there, and there is our main girl tied up in a chair who you witness
nothing happening to.
She is missing a nipple, but you don't see it get cut off, and you can
kinda see it grow back later, so she'll prolly pull through.
What really ruined the realism for me with this one is that these pals
go about like pub crawl jocks and are quite proud of what they do,
except that every time something may happen, the pal with the camera
either puts it down, points it away, or leaves the room.
Seems odd if they're all about documenting what they're doing.
Anywho, the idea of being kidnapped and tortured is there, but
the act is not.
Sorry august underground. Sorry I saw you.
Love,
-Sleeve-
This film is suppose to be set up to look like a snuff film, where a few
morbid pals are filming the abuse and killing of kidnapped townsfolk.
This one was very tame for me. The idea of what you see is disturbing,
but watching it isn't. Any scene with any sort of blood already has the
blood on it from start to finish. Nothing happens in this film. It's made
to look like a home video of a few sadistic pals who kidnap, torture and
mutilate people. But don't worry, faint of heart, you won't see any
of this.
It is all implied. (fuck. I just went through this with the hostels...)
All deaths are already, severed limbs are already just sitting
there, and there is our main girl tied up in a chair who you witness
nothing happening to.
She is missing a nipple, but you don't see it get cut off, and you can
kinda see it grow back later, so she'll prolly pull through.
What really ruined the realism for me with this one is that these pals
go about like pub crawl jocks and are quite proud of what they do,
except that every time something may happen, the pal with the camera
either puts it down, points it away, or leaves the room.
Seems odd if they're all about documenting what they're doing.
Anywho, the idea of being kidnapped and tortured is there, but
the act is not.
Sorry august underground. Sorry I saw you.
Love,
-Sleeve-
hostel 2 (2007) with dishonorable mention to hostel (2005)
...And then it was sequel time! I had no real belief that this one would
be good anyway, so no disappointment.
Hostel 2(electric boogaloo): First off, I did not really like the first one, so I really had no right to watch or review the second. But I digress. Let's visit the reason for this sequel: (money)
Hostel 1: I thought the premise was interesting and creepy, but the acting, dialogue and plot convenience stuff left the movie lacking for me.
A lot of people told me it was really gory, and I wish they hadn't because
that was one of the selling points, and I didn't find it to be gory at all.
implied gore can still be creepy, but it isn't gore. Remember when
they cut the cop's ear off in reservoir dogs? No. You don't. Remember they implied it though? They hold the blade up,
the dude gets in the way of the shot, and the camera moves away
and when we come back, his ear spot is bloodied.
Sorta like that. You don't see it happen!
It wasn't that it was not creepy, but I mean the amount of gore
that they actually show happening. I am a lover of gore in films, and
I've seen a lot of movies where you see everything that happens
while it's happening, not just the after math.
For those who tried to defend the film with specific gore parts to prove me wrong:
Achilles tendons: The scene doesn't show them being cut. You see dudes face when
the other dude heads toward the floor, and hear a noise and a scream. then when they show his ankles, they're already cut. You don't see it happen. Please watch Pet Semetary.
Fingers: Ok. This one you do see. And it's cool.
Torch: Nope. You don't see any of this happening. Dude is standing in the way
of this shot until he stops using the torch. then, he moves and you see a mess.
I'll give you creepy, but I didn't find much gore happened at all. Just aftermath. I hope that
helps to illustrate my gripe.
Back to Hostel 2: (frigs)Mostly the same, but with a female lead
and a loser plot, and waaaaaaaaaay more predictable. Shame, but
true.
Also, I have a question for anyone who managed to make it through this film:
What was with that deal that she tries to make with the dood near the end?
Does he strike you as a person who would (a) give a shit about his client's member?
(b) make a deal to save her life? Why would he care about sparing her life? Or his client?!
what?!?
And there were a few other things, but I don't want to rant too much.
This one left me going "Are you fucking kidding me?... And I said it a lot!
-Sleeve-
be good anyway, so no disappointment.
Hostel 2(electric boogaloo): First off, I did not really like the first one, so I really had no right to watch or review the second. But I digress. Let's visit the reason for this sequel: (money)
Hostel 1: I thought the premise was interesting and creepy, but the acting, dialogue and plot convenience stuff left the movie lacking for me.
A lot of people told me it was really gory, and I wish they hadn't because
that was one of the selling points, and I didn't find it to be gory at all.
implied gore can still be creepy, but it isn't gore. Remember when
they cut the cop's ear off in reservoir dogs? No. You don't. Remember they implied it though? They hold the blade up,
the dude gets in the way of the shot, and the camera moves away
and when we come back, his ear spot is bloodied.
Sorta like that. You don't see it happen!
It wasn't that it was not creepy, but I mean the amount of gore
that they actually show happening. I am a lover of gore in films, and
I've seen a lot of movies where you see everything that happens
while it's happening, not just the after math.
For those who tried to defend the film with specific gore parts to prove me wrong:
Achilles tendons: The scene doesn't show them being cut. You see dudes face when
the other dude heads toward the floor, and hear a noise and a scream. then when they show his ankles, they're already cut. You don't see it happen. Please watch Pet Semetary.
Fingers: Ok. This one you do see. And it's cool.
Torch: Nope. You don't see any of this happening. Dude is standing in the way
of this shot until he stops using the torch. then, he moves and you see a mess.
I'll give you creepy, but I didn't find much gore happened at all. Just aftermath. I hope that
helps to illustrate my gripe.
Back to Hostel 2: (frigs)Mostly the same, but with a female lead
and a loser plot, and waaaaaaaaaay more predictable. Shame, but
true.
Also, I have a question for anyone who managed to make it through this film:
What was with that deal that she tries to make with the dood near the end?
Does he strike you as a person who would (a) give a shit about his client's member?
(b) make a deal to save her life? Why would he care about sparing her life? Or his client?!
what?!?
And there were a few other things, but I don't want to rant too much.
This one left me going "Are you fucking kidding me?... And I said it a lot!
-Sleeve-
superbad (2007)
Superbad:
Not super bad, but not super funny either. It had it's moments, and
I did chuckle a bit here and there, but I kinda expected more from this
one.
It just seemed slow paced for lines and whatnot.
Like when you see a junior high school play, and everyone
knows their lines, but they have to think for a minute if
it's their cue, and "what was that line again?... Oh yeah."
Then you get the line, somewhat forced, and somewhat obvious
most of the time, but it was there.
Most of what was funny in this film were the roles of the two police officers.
Otherwise, I didn't laugh much at all.
So, there you have it. Sorry it's such a short review, but, due
to the content, there wasn't much to review on this one.
-Sleeve-
Not super bad, but not super funny either. It had it's moments, and
I did chuckle a bit here and there, but I kinda expected more from this
one.
It just seemed slow paced for lines and whatnot.
Like when you see a junior high school play, and everyone
knows their lines, but they have to think for a minute if
it's their cue, and "what was that line again?... Oh yeah."
Then you get the line, somewhat forced, and somewhat obvious
most of the time, but it was there.
Most of what was funny in this film were the roles of the two police officers.
Otherwise, I didn't laugh much at all.
So, there you have it. Sorry it's such a short review, but, due
to the content, there wasn't much to review on this one.
-Sleeve-
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